Weird Plant

This thing has been growing in our yard since we have moved in and nobody seems to know what it is. Especially now in early autumn it looks very corn-related but I know no specific. Any ideas? (For reference the shed in the picture is probably 15 feet tall at its peak.)

One Six Right

I like movies, all kinds of movies. Some have said I like weird movies, and, at times, I must agree. I enjoy seeing art of many kinds but films offer a very large canvas on which to build. Just think about it. There are movies filled with special effects eye candy and there are films with only a few characters set in places that could be just down the street. They are all trying to tell a story of some kind (well, almost always) and those creating the film work to realize that story.

Last night Katie and I saw a film made by a man who is passionate about aviation. It was released a year or two ago and was playing one night in Wichita as a sort of 'thank-you' to Cessna who helped underwrite it. The story is of aviation told through the busiest general aviation (that is, "non-commercial") airport in the US (maybe the world): the Van Nuys Airport. The producer and director learned to fly at this airport and loves flying. He spent four years of his life building this film to express that love and did an truly wonderful job. No fancy special effects to speak of, just a simple documentary he crafted together in an expert manner.

We were blessed to have this man, Brian Terwilliger, there at the screening and it was wonderful to hear what you might call "DVD extras" live and in person. After hearing him speak, it was easy to see the strong connection between the film and the man. If I ever get into film, I would be blessed to be able to so clearly and simply communicate through that medium.

If you get a chance to see it, especially if it is on the big screen, take it. It is a great example of simple and powerful artistic expression.

One Six Right


(As a side note, the film was shot in digital HD and a digital projector was used in our screening. The quality was noticeably improved over regular film but nothing so spectacular that I would call it "revolutionary". I wouldn't stay up too late worrying about when your local theater will decide to go digital.)

Shameless Pitch

I recently ordered a flash memory card from Memorysuppliers.com and they are offering me $10 back for posting their link on my blog so here it is:

http://www.memorysuppliers.com/

The store appears to be the place to get memory for both mobile devices (like digital cameras, cell phones, PDAs) as well as memory for your desktop or laptop computer.

Sorry if this ad is distracting, thanks for being understanding. Feel free to leave a comment about my shameless efforts to save a few bucks.

Equinox

In the park down the street from us, Wichita has a very cool piece of public art that is especially neat four times each year: a solar calendar. In the tradition of many ancient cultures, a couple of artists here in Wichita collaborated to construct an accurate solar calendar that clearly marks the two equinoxes and two solstices that occur each year.

The piece has several stone pillars throughout the area but there is one central stone pillar and it has a steel and glass orifice mounted at its peak (make to look artistically similar to a human eye).




This orifice casts an eye-shaped shadow (with the pupil being open) on the ground and as the sun moves throughout the day and year, so does this shadow. The artists have also placed on the ground three marker stones with tennis-ball sized glass discs mounted on the surface such that at "high noon" on each solstice and equinox the pupil of the eye lands exactly on the glass disc and illuminates it. Think of Indiana Jones in "Raiders of the Lost Ark" but without all the special effects.

Well, today was the day after the equinox and a small crowd gathered at the solar calendar to see the show. (Yesterday being a work day, I'm assuming the turn-out wasn't as good). Due to daylight savings, "high noon" was around 1:30 or so and there was probably about two dozen people there. We were also blessed to have the artists show up for the event which I really enjoyed. Since celestial event itself was rather slow-paced and predictable, they were able to explain how they constructed the piece and explain some of the more esoteric artistic references. (All of the pillars are decorated with painted tiles meant to allude to the various ancient methods of time-keeping).

As it turned out, being one day late for the event meant the shadow was slightly out of place. The artists said that the equinoxes are the most precise and every day counts but around the time of the solstices, the eye appears to land exactly on the glass for several weeks.



Here's the view of the glass target stone looking back up towards the eye.



The next event is on December 21st at the winter solstice and it should be easier to see the eye exactly on the eye (as long as it isn't cloudly). The artists also mentioned they had another project in the works for a larger, calendar/time-piece for the county park here in Wichita. Considering they just got this one done in 2004, I'm surprised and pleased that they would be able to do something similar so quickly. Maybe Wichita isn't as un-cultured as I thought.

Third Injection

Two weeks ago I had my third and final epidural injection for the herniated disc in my back. (For reasons I don't understand, they only do three injections for any one injury.) It had been about five months since I had been in for my second injection; it had only minimal long-term effect. I had waited this long since the last one to give physical therapy a chance to do its magic and, as I have mentioned previously, there has been some definite improvement as my abdominal muscles have strengthened. With the physical therapy ending, it was time to give this all one more shot.

The procedure went very smoothly. From the time when the surgeon walked in to him walking out was no more then ten minutes; I had forgotten just how quickly these things can go. Post-proedure pain was fairly minimal but I knew by the time I got in the car I wouldn't be going back to work that day.

Two weeks later, I can say that the injection has gone a long way and that I am as pain-free as I have ever been since the injury. I am able to walk long-distances (a mile or so) without significant pain and have been able to do more than lay down when I get home from work. I am very thankful for such marked improvement.

The flip-side is that I'm not all the way healed and still have to answer the surgery question. Due to insurance weirdness, if I do the surgery this year, its free. If I wait, I will definitely have to pay and, due to ever-decreasing insurance coverage, probably have to pay more than I expected. Despite, or maybe because of, all my progress, this decision is still not clear cut. I'm going to be visiting my neurosurgeon soon and see what he thinks. Feel free to leave a note and let me know you're thoughts.

Hey, maybe I'll get to do another cool MRI!

In Business News...

Recently, our company announced the "top secret" (aka obvious progression of our existing models) new business jet: the CJ4. This is the model that I have been working on for several months and will continue to be working on for the next year or two. Yes, we really do announce products that far in advance. We have firm orders for over one hundred of another model, the Mustang, and we have yet to certify the plane or make a single delivery. Does it seem odd to you that customers are lining up without ever haven even taken this for a test drive? Ask me sometime to explain the crazy world of private business jets.

Here's a nifty little press release that gives you all the fun stats for the plane (again, prior to it even being built.)

http://www.cessna.com/news/article.chtml?ID=buKkVHZ237qaHQJkpv6VAVsE8LmmyRYUAdf1dk7iE9qFUlQvCr

Not related to Cessna but still in the aerospace vein, Lockheed-Martin won the contract for the next generation space vehicle. Their winning bid calls for a capsule approach to space travel, much like the Apollo program. To me, this seems a step back but I think after two very disastrous Shuttle accidents, NASA is making higher reliability and lower cost a priority.

If you want to really know why Lockheed choose this approach you can give my good friend Jon Markley a call. He works Lockheed. In fact, he works in the rocket program they have.

Yes, yes. Jon Markley is a rocket scientist.

OK Go

Months after they were hot, I wanted to pass along two fun music videos self-produced by the band "OK Go". (I heard about them on NPR if that's any clue how out of the loop I am when if comes to these things.) The first video is fun but the second one gets the award for "Best Use of Treadmills In a Music Video".

Seriously, whoever choreographed this deserves a medal.

Enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_fe196bnpmY

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jWCSGGrU9MA

I'm Healed!

Well, not entirely.

Today was my last physical therapy session for a while. The physical therapist said that she had pretty much done everything she could for me and that if I continued with the exercise regimen she had developed, my back would continue to improve. And my back has been improving these past few weeks, albeit slowly. She gave me some guidance for future exercises including a recommendation to do some pilates. (Boy, I don't know if I'm secure enough in my masculinity to do something like that. Maybe I'll just get a ball and DVD and do them at home.) The best part, though, is that I got a free exercise band; all I had to do was ask!

So what now?

Well, I'll continue with my exercises, plan on doing my third and final steroid injection in the near future, and we'll see what happens from there.

Death of the 24-hour Kinkos?

It appears that there are NO Kinkos open 24-hours-a-day here in Wichita. I checked the website and they all open at 7am and close at 11pm on most days. Kind of sad? What about the Kinkos in your area? If there are no longer any 24-hour Kinkos then I feel we have truly lost something as a society. I can't say exactly what that might be but it is something.

(This has come about because I am dropping my wife off at the airport this morning at 5am and need to make a photocopy of a maintenance request to our landlord before I submit it. The ceiling in our kitchen is dripping water onto the floor. Quite a thing to discover at 4:00am as you're getting ready for work. Hopefully the craziness of today ends when I get her to the airport.)

Doing nothing

UPDATES

-The Wichita water test is going much slower than I expected. The pan of water finally evaporated off and I'm afraid the results are inconclusive. There is a lot of particulate stuff (including dried blades of grass) that I think got into the water when it was out in my car and the landscaping people mowed the lawn.

I think I'm going to try this again but put some kind of cover over the pan to prevent stuff like this from getting into the water. The tricky part is that the cover will still need to allow water vapor to get out. Saran wrap with a bunch of small holes in it?

-Scooter riding is still going great. Getting 80+ mpg and enjoying the rides.

-Katie and I are looking into getting a scanner so that we can electronicazationify some of our paper documents. I found out that the IRS does accept electronic versions of tax documents; this could save us a ton of filing cabinet space. We could do the same with much of the paper documentation we are hanging onto right now. As to when we are getting said scanner, well, it could be a while. We'll let you know.

-My latest exploration topic: nuclear breeder reactors. Pretty interesting stuff. In ways that I don't fully understand, it is possible to reprocess a large percentage of most nuclear waste to both reclaim/recreate some of the fuel and produce a by-product with a half-life of a century or so (vs 20,000 years). From what it sounds like, the process can be made to generate more fuel than you put in. (Don't ask me how, I don't understand the details yet.) The US has outlawed such reactors in an attempt to prevent nuclear proliferation but there are rumblings that if nuclear energy takes off in the US, such a ban might be lifted.

Why might the US embrace nuclear power after several decades of shunning it? Zero carbon emissions. In fact, more than a few environmentalists are getting on-board the nuclear bandwagon because it is so much "cleaner" than coal/natural gas power plants.

-Lastly, Katie and I got some neat folding bookcases to replace the particle-board deathtraps we've had. Literally our old ones were falling apart (and may have done so on top of us). We'll see how these new ones hold up. They fold up in a way that is kind of hard to explain in writing but, hopefully, this will make moving easier.

Heat Wave

Yes, folks, it has been hot here in Wichita.

Very, very hot.

The temperature here the past week has had high's in the triple-digits with the latest peak being 109 'F. I think this is the hottest weather in which I have ever been.

Scooter riding has been fine, though, thanks to a jacket that is meshed and allows air to pass through it rather easily. The ride has been short enough that I have been able to stay cool without sweating up a storm. Heat exhaustion/dehydration, though, can be a challenge; drinking lots of water is the norm.

Speaking of water, I have a friend at work who is enough of a health nut that he distills all tap water at home to remove as much of the nastiness as possible. He says, in fact, that every three gallons of Wichita water he distills leave behind a teaspoon or two of, well, nasty-smelling yellow residue. By his account, the tap water from all four places he has lived in Wichita over the past several years have had this residue. By methods I cannot remember he was also able to "test" Phoenix water and found that it did not leave this contaminant behind.

Me, I've never been a big one to be concerned about water purity. After seeing his "vial of vile" though, I was at least slightly concerned. And, unlike some of the other health-nut claims he has made, there is a very easy way to test his assertion! I got a big glass baking pan, filled it with tap water, and have left it a hot, isolated environment (inside my car with the widows cracked) for the past several days and let our record-setting heat evaporate away the liquid. The experiment isn't quite finished yet so I don't have result yet but I'll post them when I get done. (This is another advantage of taking my scooter to work; I can use my car as an oven without having to pay for electricity! Brilliant, I say!)

Regardless of the results, I figure this is probably not a bad thing to do wherever I live. The test is easy and it will give you at least a rule-of-thumb estimate about the quality of the water. Sadly, distillation won't remove ALL water impurities. Anything that boils at a lower temperature than water (alcohol, for example) will also evaporate off with the water. This test really only reveals the particulate contamination in the water. I don't know how carbon filters work (the kind used in most homes, like Brita) so I don't know if they would get rid of this kind of stuff. We have just such a filter and use it often so I may re-run the experiment using filtered water as well just to see what happens.

So, in conclusion:
-It is very hot in Wichita right now.
-Wichita water might be nasty.
-Unused cars left out in the sun all day can double as an oven.
-Science is fun!

Scooter Miscellanea

Tank Capacity: 1.6 gallons/6L

Fuel efficiency on first tank: 60 (25.5 km/L for you metric folks)

New top speed: 55mph/90kph (I still haven't tried going all out; maybe I can do 60?)

Odometer reading: 256km (Yes the odometer is in km. Kind of explains all the metric-y stuff above, doesn't it.)

Other: I passed my motorcycle driving test today which means I am a fully licensed scooter/motorcycle driver here in KS. The test was not difficult but I did far from perfect. I didn't go in expecting to pass but, well, I did. I will leave it as an exercise to the reader to determine if somebody with nearly exactly one week of experience driving a scooter should be able to pass the motorcycle drivers test.

Scooter-ific!

It has been five days since the maiden trip-around-the-block was made on my new scooter and since then I've put 135 km (83 miles) on it. In short, it has been a pretty sweet ride. I've run errands, gone to work, gone to physical therapy all without incident. I feel very confident that adjusting to scooter-based transportation will not be a very big deal at all.

I'm loving the fuel economy (I'm guessing I'll get over 50 mpg on this first tank), handling is similar to bicycle (not near as agile, though) and the learning curve isn't near as steep as I had thought. Smoothly accelerating through turns and maintaining a constant speed are skills I am still developing, hopefully quickly. And before I forget, it is fun to ride! Its similar to riding a bicycle in that I feel I am more aware of my surroundings and a part of what I am riding through and not as isolated as I feel in a car. Its a little hard to explain in words but if you spend much time on a bicycle, you'll know what I mean. (If you haven't been spending much time on a bicycle, what are you waiting for; get on it!) Oh, and the insurance I have is full coverage with a $100 deductible for $170/year. This is a fraction of what it costs to insure my car with a $500 deductible. The economy of a scooter is quite clear; in insurance savings alone it will pay for itself in short order.

The only real down side right now is that it is easy to get hot when its 100'F outside and I'm all geared up. The jacket I have is mesh and the visor on the helmet pops up easily so if I'm moving at any speed over 5 mph I can stay pretty cool. When traffic stops at a light, though, it doesn't take long before I eager to be moving again. For now, the work-around I'm going to use is having jeans and I shirt I wear whenever I ride and a set of clothes I can change into at work. Not ideal, but really no different than what I do when I bicycle.

All in all, I'm very pleased with how things have worked out. Obviously I can't make any definitive comments but based on my experience so far, I would recommend a scooter for all able-bodied souls who are looking for an economical and fun way to get yourself around. And really, this is why Katie and I decided a scooter would work well for me; 90% of the time I spend driving I am just moving me. You can't beat the low purchase, fuel, and insurance costs of a scooter for moving one person.

Without any further delay, here are some of the promised pictures. Enjoy!





Me and my good friend Mia assess the caged beast.




Did I mention that since that battery wasn't charged we had to jump-start the bike on the first ride? My super-helpful friend Steven is there on the left. Less helpful (when it comes to all things mechanical) but always good to have around Matt is on the right.




Very first ride. Ever.

Its Alive!

Quick update: after a few hours of work (mainly me assisting the efforts of my newest best friend Steven), the scooter is up and running! Assembly was smooth, we had to resort to jump starting it the first time as the battery hadn't been fully charged yet, and I've taken it for a spin around the block. That short ride convinced me, though, that I need a bit more practice before I strike out on the road in a full-time way; no commuting to work today.

There is a moderate list of things that need to done or re-done to, uhmmm, overcome some of the non-standard assembly we resorted to to get all the pieces together. The most significant is the auxiliary right blinker was mis-wired and I'll have to figure out how it really needs to be connected.

I'll give you the full scoop later (including pictures of me in my Power-Ranger-esque cycling gear). Stay posted for further updates.

Almost There

Well, I've spent the past week talking, emailing, and discussing my scooter with the retailer I purchased it from and I've decided to keep it. This is partially motivated by the difficulty in returning the item, partially by the fact that the same shop here in town will be able to provide service for it and has parts in stock, and partially because I believe that the scooter I was delivered will perform just as well as the one I ordered. This is actually another way of saying that I bought a chinese scooter from a primarily online dealer and if I wanted top-notch service and a top-notch product I would have been shopping elsewhere (and paying four times as much.) When all is said and done, you get what you paid for and I expected difficulties like this along the way. All that matters now is how this specific scooter performs.

This we shall soon be finding out, too. An eager friend of mine with vast amount of knuckle-scrapping automotive knowledge is coming over tomorrow evening and the two of us are going to be uncrating and assembling the scooter. The assembly isn't very involved: attaching side-view mirrors, attaching front windshield, putting acid in the battery and charging it, and attaching the rear luggage trunk. I'm pretty confident that I could do this all on my own but I'll appreciate the help of an expert. (Plus he is VERY eager to see how all of this goes; he asked me if he could come over, not the other way around.)

Last but not least, the title for the scooter arrived in the mail today so I'm going to be picking up plates tomorrow as well. This means that the plan is to have a fully functioning and street-legal scooter by tomorrow evening. As you might guess, I am VERY excited by this prospect and am looking forward to my first scooter-ride to work as early as Friday.

With fingers crossed....

Caveat Emptor

Well, after four weeks of waiting, minor hassles and confusion regarding the shipping date and the tracking number my scooter has finally arrived!

I got a call on Wednesday from the freight company saying that delivery would be between noon and 3pm on Thursday and they'd give me a call half-an-hour before attempting delivery. The next day I got a call at 10:30 from the truck driver saying he was two block from my house and asked if I was there to accept delivery. Sigh. Logistics can be difficult but you figure a freight company would be good at it. Fortunately, I was able to leave work and head home right away so all worked out fine. The driver backed his semi into the alley (How do they do that? I would have trouble doing that in my Civic.) lowered the gate, and we pushed the rather large box into the garage. The driver was a very pleasant and helpful and didn't seem to have minded waiting a few minutes for me to get to home.

That evening, in the company of a few friends that were over for dinner, we tore into the cardboard box the lay eyes on the machine.

The first thing I noticed: it wasn't the color I ordered.

The second thing: it wasn't the brand I ordered.

As you might imagine, these two things are not trivial and it took me a few minutes to get past them. Katie was snapping pictures while we opened the box and I'm very curious if they will show the disappointment on my face. Once I had accepted that even after delivery, things were not perfect, I began to look more closely at the bike.

The cardboard box turned out to be a kind of exterior surface for a rectangular metal frame that caged they bike. The frame looks like 1/4" steel angle-bracket; very serious stuff. The bike will take some assembly (not much) and it is a lot bigger than I expected. The styling is very similar to the bike I thought I would be getting and it looks like all I was hoping for in a scooter. The promised luggage truck was included and the keys were in the ignition.

So, after looking everything over, I got back on the computer and reread over all the fine print I had read before ordering. Boy, I must not have looked very closely because there are a lot of stipulations in the purchasing agreement. The most interesting one that may explain my situation is the following:

"All model numbers and name are use as references only and does not represent the name on the scooter."
and
"Bnscooters does not guarantee color options. Customer may request a color option, however if the color requested is not available during time of shipping, we automatically ship out a default color without notification. This condition is due to high sales volume and non real time updates on inventory. We make every effort in keeping our inventory updated, however Bnscooters reserves the rights to ship out a newer model or higher priced model at our discretion if the model you order is out of stock or unavailable. Pictures and specifications displayed on our site may be subject to change due to constant improvements from the manufacture. We reserve the right to update model specifications at any time."
Does this seem funny to you? When it all boils down, it really seems like they view your order as a suggestion and they try their best to honor your request. No promises though.
If I had noticed this when I placed the order I may not have ordered from them. Caveat emptor, buyer beware.
What's done is done, though, and though they do provide a way to return the scooter, I would have to pay shipping and a restocking fee so I don't know how interested I am in that. The silver lining on this cloud: this online retailer is based here in Wichita and they have a shop. I'll be going in today to talk all of this over with them and see what can be worked out. This single fact, that I would be able to visit the store in-person, is the only reason I took the risk in placing such an order online. Without that face-to-face accountability, I wouldn't have taken the chance.
When all is said and done, things don't seem so bad. I have a scooter and as long as I can get some kind of co-operation out of the dealer (parts availability, specifically), I think things will work out. If this ends up being a big fiasco, well, at least I didn't spend several thousand dollars on the scooter. I'll learn my lesson and do things differently next time. Until then, I have every intention of enjoying the scooter.

We have a WHAT!?

I have spent quite a few hours today trying to combine all the paper files that Katie and I have. Katie had already gone through her's, getting rid of things she didn't need and carefully organizing everything into distinct folders. Today I have been doing the same for mine as well as trying to group the two sets of folders together. (First rule of organizing, one I have to remind myself of often: make sure everything has a home.)

As I was doing this I got to my folder with all my car-related documents in it and, knowing Katie would have a similar folder, I went over to her box of folders and started searching. Sure enough, there was a folder named "CAR" right there, just like I expected.

Right behind it was another one labeled "LEARJET."



(Blink.)



Hmmm. Maybe that's where all our money has been going.

Midwest Ocean

Yesterday afternoon we had the most torrential rain I have ever seen. It was raining so hard that leeks in the roof I had never noticed during previous rains were gushing water, enough for a shower. Virtually all the pavement was flooded over with an inch or two of water, most of it rapidly flowing towards the nearest storm drain. The day was slow so I walked out to the experimental hanger where they had the barn-doors open and watched the storm roll through.

In front of me was the large stretch of pavement that serves as our taxi-way to the runway, larger than most parking lots I've seen. And, as you might imagine, it was mostly empty; no planes coming or going in weather like this. The pavement was completely covered in water flowing and rushing to the drains. The surface of the water was covered in near-infinite pock marks as icy rain drops continued to fall from the sky. The wind was blowing creating waves of rain and waves on the surface of the growing body of water in front of me.

For a few moments I felt like I was at the ocean.

Wind in my face, water mist (not really salty) blowing through the air, large expanse of empty... This is the closest I figure I'll ever get here in Wichita to experiencing the ocean.

Two Wheels It Is!

I am delighted to let you all know that this last week my lovely wife gave a thumbs-up on the purchase of a scooter! Yipee!

Needless to say, I was online placing the order within a few hours and am now in the state of eager anticipation of the said scooter to arrive. Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!

When I'm not thinking about the scooter itself, I'm thinking about the, uhmmmm, accessories that I'll need for using it. This ranges from protective clothing to wear while riding to upgrade parts (like brighter headlights for more visibility). So far my purchases have consisted of a helmet and a gas can.

The helmet I got is quite a thing to behold. It was on clearance and I think I can understand why: its purple with gold highlights/trim. The purple color I actually like; it is has a matte finish and a deep shade of purple. The gold highlights, though, kind of move the helmet over the top into something that looks like it should be from a comic book or a cartoon. Oh well, it was 45% off and is esteemed as a quality helmet.

Getting a gas can that I liked ended up being quite and ordeal. Every store I went to sold only one brand of can and, without sounding too picky, I'll just say I didn't care for the spout design. The marketing and sales team for this company is incredible though. Four of the five stores I looked at carried that brand exclusively. It was amazing. The whole city of Wichita and it seemed that there was only one (stupid) brand of gas can available. The fifth store I went to had this brand but also carried a Briggs and Stratton can as well with a MUCH better spout design.

I've placed an order for a jacket and pants and am still on the prowl for gloves and boots. (Just stopped in at Red Wing on the way home from work to see what they had.)

I realize that many people might think I am going a bit overboard when it comes to getting all this gear for a measly scooter but as I have been dealing with this on-going back injury and its financial burden I have realized just how damaging any kind of accident on a scooter could be. The financial cost could be huge but the loss of functionality of some parts of my body would be an even greater difficulty. This protective gear is, in my mind, a small price to pay to provide greater protection as I scoot around town. Thankfully, my wife is in agreement on this.

For the Love of Taxes

Yes, yes, this past Tuesday I was audited by the IRS. (Wow. "Audited." Never thought I would ever write that.)

The "invitation" I received to have my 2004 return "examined" was apparently chosen at random and my charitable contributions were singled out as the item of primary concern. (No suprise to me as I feel very responsible for how I spend my money and know that when all is said and done I will be held accountable for the financial choices I make; I like passing on the blessing God has given me and act accordingly.) Fortunately, I still had all my financial data from 2004 and it only took an hour or so to organize it and draw up a spreadsheet detailing the contributions I had made. Oddly, I was asked to bring my 2003 and 2005 returns as well even though it was very clear from the letter that it was my 2004 return that was under examination. Hmmmm.

Thus Tuesday morning around 8:25am I walked into a/the federal building in downtown Wichita with a backpack filled with documents. A quick airport-style securty screening (complete with x-ray machines and metals dectectors) and I was up the elevator and seated at the desk of my examiner. As it turns out, she was a relatively new hire and her boss was there examing her ans she examined me. I found this quite humorous but decided to keep the joke to myself. This is, after all, the stern-faced IRS.

First question from the examiner: "Anything you want to tell us about now up-front? Any known omissions or errors on your return?" Yikes! That is quite a loaded question. Without much pause I decided to stick to my guns and declined to the opportunity to confess to cheating on my taxes. The examiner then deftly noted that I did my own return. Had I always done my own return? Yes, I always had, without the aid of any software. She was good, though, letting me know this wasn't a social visit in the least.

Still not getting to the item listed in the letter, she then went through the process of verfiying my source(s) of income. Do you have any interest-bearing accounts? Any investments that generate capital gains? Alimony? Child-support? Trusts? Estates? No, no, no, no..... Again, the purpose of these questions seemed more at getting me to confirm that my original income stated on my return was accurate and/or confess to any revenue that might have "slipped my mind" when I filed my returns. Towards the end my patience was wearing a wee bit thin; I felt like saying, "Just look at my return! That's my income!" Obviously, that wouldn't have helped. Its also worth noting that these questions literally had nothing to do with why they brought me in. They seemed to be standard questions that anybody being audited would have to answer.

While I'm thinking about it, the letter I received specifically mentioned that a lawyer or tax-preparer was allowed to join me for the examination. Considering that I lived in Boise in 2004 the odds of any relevant party in my tax preparation being available here in Wichita are virtually zero. If I hadn't done my own taxes, I wonder how I could have answered some of the questions posed. This is a point in favor of doing your own taxes or at least understanding every item on the tax return. You as an individual may be the one having to defend your return, not your tax-preparer or lawyer.

Finally, we jumped into the official item of examination, my charitable contributions. Having the spreadsheet delineating all the pertinent transactions helped TREMENDOUSLY. The spreadsheet showed the total for allof my contributions (which matched what I declard on my taxes) and was broken down by the individual organizations involved; these matched the statements I had received from each organization. The examiner didn't check every single donation (thankfully; that would have taken quite a bit of time) but sampled from each organization to which I had donated. She asked for not only a receipt verifying the donation but also proof from my accounts that I had actually made the donation (typically in the form of a
cleared check, credit card statement or bank statement). Its this latter part that caught me off-gaurd; if memory serves, the instructions on the tax return form only mention a receipt for each donation and not necessarily a corresponding cleared check or the like. I guess the assumption is you'll keep bank and credit-card statements; thankfully, I had.

There were a few minor hiccups in the process: I couldn't find my bank statement for the month of one of the transactions that was sampled for examination; a carbon copy of the original check was good enough. Also, there was a question whether one of the charities to which I had donated was officially registered as such. After a bit of digging with no conclusive answer the examiner got pragmatic. In light of the relatively small donation amount, the fact that this was a one-time donation and that I didn't intend to donate again she decided to give me the benefit of the doubt and assume the charity was registered.

This brings up another interesting point: over the course of the interview/examination she asked for a brief description of the kind of work each charity carried out. This was not only a great opportunity to talk to these (assumedly) non-Christians about the good that Christians are trying to bring to this world but also to remind me about each of these projects. It made me feel blessed that I could be a part of what God is doing, to be cut-in on the action.

A few more questions, checking a few more transactions, and we were done. The examiner was pleased that things went so quickly and when all was said and done, no adjustment was made to my return. Yeah! In-and-out in under an hour.

Lessons from the examination:
-Keep EVERYTHING. Official paper documentation for all financial matters makes any kind of audit much easier for you and the IRS
-Keep everything ORGANIZED. Again, having all these documents readily available made the whole process go very smoothly.
-UNDERSTAND your tax return and be comfortable justifying any item on the return. Having the above mentioned documentation makes this easier.